I woke early this morning with the needs of so many on my mind...the friend who is taking her BIG test today...the friend who needs a place to stay for ten days while going through radiation therapy, the friend who is on day eleven of no smoking, the friend who is writing a book on shame, the friend who is raising a niece and nephew while her sister and brother in-law are in prison, the friend of a friend who gave birth to a still-born baby boy last week...and Nancy, the woman I would like to call friend who I met at the Asian market last Saturday.
I thought of Nancy and decided to check my email to see if I had heard back from her. What I found instead was an email from Michelle, of the Proverbs 31 editing team, informing me that I did not win the scholarship giveaway for the She Speaks Conference. I am okay with that. I was never sure if my submission into the contest was about winning and attending the conference or not. I just knew God was telling me to write the article and submit it...so, I obeyed.
However, I admit I expected something to come from it...some clue as to what direction I am to go next. Yet, the contest has come and gone, the winner has been announced, and I cannot see where I gained any direction from that experience...not yet, anyway. No doubt, God will show me what that exercise was all about...eventually. For, now, though, I feel like I am at the same spot I was a week ago--before I learned of the contest--asking the question "Now what?"...and all the other questions that go with it.
And so I wait.